I made soup this week, and it was just what I needed — a hug in liquid form.
I had never made borscht before; I thought it was a Polish dish, Russian perhaps; I didn’t know it was Ukrainian. The recipe was in Sam Sifton’s NYT Cooking newsletter last Wednesday. The second I saw it, I wanted to make it. I love potatoes.
The recipe is by Gabrielle Hamilton, another NY Times writer and author of Blood, Bones & Butter, which I now want to read. The soup was delicious, and I will make it again, I’m sure.
Get the recipe and try it yourself (potential paywall) here.
Belfast
This morning I watched the most beautiful movie. I’m sure most of you recognize the picture. It’s called Belfast — one of the best movies I’ve watched in a very long time. No wonder it has been nominated for several Academy Awards, including best picture! I think everyone should see it.
Week eight of 2022 ended sadly. Another war and more people dying for no good reason. What does war solve?
To write about what I was making this week, or to tell you what delicious recipe you should try next, seems completely irrelevant. And honestly, I haven’t been inspired to do either since Thursday.
Actually, even before the events of the past few days, I have been noticing myself feeling kind of blah about everything. The pandemic has lasted too long; even after vaccinations and now with the new post-pandemic “normal” slowly setting in, everything has changed so much. I think I’m just exhausted, and it seems like there’s no end to bad news.
All this led me to an article by Adam Grant about languishing. He describes it as a mental state in which you aren’t quite depressed, but are not flourishing, either. He wrote it to describe a general lack of joy and direction many people were experiencing in 2021. But in 2022, I can relate.
In his article, Grant tells us that flow (a concept introduced by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi through his research on “optimal experience”) may help us fight the feelings of languishing.
Grant summarizes flow as “…that elusive state of absorption in a meaningful challenge or a momentary bond, where your sense of time, place and self melts away.” The idea is that moments of flow will generate positive emotions and increase our resilience.
Collecting photos of flowers from around my neighborhood, Feb. 2022.
It might seem useless and trivial to focus on trying a new recipe or handmade project when so many people around us are suffering, but these are just the types of activities that can lead to a state of flow and help us cope with what we can’t control.
Taking up a hobby or meditation, focusing our attention as we take a photo, trying to solve a challenging puzzle, or tackling a new craft project are all activities that can help.
Of course, attaining flow will not help solve the political or economic problems of the world. But at least it might help us endure the chaos we are living in.
As I said, I haven’t felt like making much in the past week. Instead, I’ve been spending my evenings watching Bonusfamiljen, which could make sense. I found interesting what Grant says about ways he achieves flow, “A late-night Netflix binge sometimes does the trick too — it transports you into a story where you feel attached to the characters and concerned for their welfare.” Perhaps this has been my way of finding flow and coping, lately.
Flow, by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
There is not much I can do to stop a 17-mile-long convoy on its way to Kyiv this instant, just like there wasn’t much I could do to save all the people that died from Covid in the past two years. I also cannot feed all those suffering from hunger all over the world, or stop the next climate disaster. But letting the chaos of the world slowly suck me into a depression won’t solve anything, either.
There are small things I can do to help the world be a better place. I can invest in my mental health which will make me a more resilient person. I can be a good parent and teach my children to be kind to others. I can support humanitarian organizations I believe in. I can help promote cultural understanding and acceptance by learning about and sharing inspiring work by makers and artists from different parts of the world. I can teach others how to knit so they can practice a hobby that might help them with their own mindfulness and mental health. I can practice gratitude daily. And most important of all, I can do my best to model kindness, understanding, and love.
I wish you all well, and as my father-in-law always says when he bids farewell…
Not a whole lot happened over the weekend. I had promised Shortie to take her to the City to look for a dress for her prom, which I keep pretending isn’t really happening. I’m still in denial that this year is her senior year. It feels like yesterday when I was pushing a double stroller down the street or hanging out at the park with my two toddlers and random people would stop to say things like, ‘Oh my goodness, what cuties! Enjoy them mom. They grow upso fast!’
But, as a stressed-out first-time parent, I never really listened. When you are in the middle of raising little kids, your mind is too busy wondering if your children will actually take a nap on your drive back to the house, or if you have enough diapers to make it through another day, so you can avoid another stop, especially if they’ve fallen asleep in the carseats. And the reality is, they dogrow super fast, and in the blink of an eye your babies are suddenly 15 and 17, driving or learning to drive cars, and on their way to college!
But I guess that’s the way it is with a lot of things in life. We don’t learn from the things people tell us. It’s only after you go through it yourself that you finally get it, for better or for worse.
We had a nice time in the City. We didn’t find a dress, but Nick tagged along which was fun. It’s not often these days that I get both kids together for a whole day. (Teenagers, you know!) We found some pants for Nick and managed to get a table at a very busy restaurant.
After shopping for about an hour or so, we were tired and hungry, so we went up to the restaurant on the seventh floor, where the host told us the wait time would be 40 minutes – unless we wanted to eat at the bar. We didn’t want to eat at the bar, so we decided to keep on shopping and come back later, hoping it would be less busy.
About 45 minutes later, we returned to the restaurant and got the same answer: the wait time would be 40 minutes. So, I asked if the bar was open. (At that point, I didn’t mind eating at the bar anymore. We were hungry!) The host said that indeed, the bar was open, and pointed us in the right direction. As we entered the bar area, I noticed not one, but several empty tables. I gestured to the kids to follow me to one of the tables in the corner of the room and told them to sit down. A waiter came over a few minutes later and took our drink order and brought us some warm bread. It was a little sneaky, I know, and totally out of character for me, which I think kind of shocked the kids. They were worried we’d get in trouble, but instead we got to eat some decent food and enjoy the beautiful view of the city from the closest table to the terrace. I don’t know what got into me. Hunger, perhaps?
On our way out of the building we also got to see some of the preparations for the Chinese New Year Parade, which we didn’t know was happening later that day; it would have been so fun to see it.
On Tuesday morning, I had to go back to San Francisco and while walking near the Embarcadero, I stumbled upon the parade dragon that had we missed on Sunday. I thought it was an interesting coincidence. Good luck, you think? Gung Hay Fat Choy!
Favorite Breakfast: Blueberry-Ricotta Pancakes
It was President’s Day on Monday and Patrick made pancakes. The day was beautiful, so we ate on the deck. It had been a long time since we’d made these pancakes, which are delicious. (Recipe by Giada de Laurentiis). The ricotta gives the pancakes extra fluffiness and more flavor overall — and I just love blueberries. I also love it when Patrick makes breakfast. I highly recommend these!
Knitting Update
In the knitting world, I’m sorry to say I haven’t made great progress on any of my projects. I have spent a lot of time testing swatches for the diamond blanket I wrote about last week and the more I think about it, I don’t think I have a blanket in me at this time, so I’ve decided to try knitting some placemats instead. The only problem is that the yarn I have has different weights, so finding the perfect needles to make everything fit (this is knit like a puzzle) has been a bit of a challenge. I think I’m getting close to figuring out the needle size and the colors I want to use. I’ll report back soon!
Hello, there! I am totally late posting this. It’s been quite chaotic around here the past couple of weeks. At my office, our graphic designer resigned and I suddenly had to switch gears and wear her “hat”. It had been quite a while since I worked in production juggling multiple jobs with tight deadlines, so I am pretty exhausted and can’t wait until we hire a replacement.
Sick Doggie
Did you know dogs can get pink eye? I had no idea. My little dog had been looking a bit off. She kept squinting like when the light is too bright. It took me a while to notice it, but then it was obvious something wasn’t right with her eyes. I googled a bit and found it could be conjunctivitis, a.k.a. pink eye. So, I took her to the vet on Saturday and have been Nurse Gabi for a few days. Thankfully, she’s feeling much better!
Since it’s been so crazy, I was very pleased to actually finish one of my projects in progress — my first pair of socks, ever.
I had been scared of making socks. The process looked easy up until you reached the heel. ‘How did they do that?!,’ And now I know one way of doing it. As in everything in knitting, there are many ways to turn a heel.
Turning the heel wasn’t as difficult as I imagined. One thing that kept me going is my tip for you this week: When you first look at a pattern, you might be intimidated by techniques you don’t know or have never heard of, and abbreviations that make no sense. But don’t despair! If you like the pattern, don’t think about any of that. Just start.
Taking a pattern one step at a time and one instruction at a time is what will get you from beginner to pro one day. You’ll learn a lot! It won’t always be easy. You’ll have to be resourceful and find good videos that show you how to do things you don’t know yet, or good books, or become great friends with the person that runs your local yarn store. There is a wealth of free info out there. You just need to want that finished project badly enough. And you can apply this tip to other areas of your life. So, what’s your next project? Let me know in the comments.
Bonusfamiljen
Since my eyes have been so tired from trying to align pixels all day at work, I haven’t had the energy to knit. So, my amazing green sweater is still pretty much where I left it a few weeks ago.
Instead, I’ve been spending my evenings watching a Swedish t.v. series called Bonusfamiljen or Bonus Family. It’s a “dramedy” and funny enough, even though I am not a huge “dramedy” fan, I am hooked.
Bonusfamiljen on www.svtplay.se
The show has helped me realize just how bad my Swedish is at this moment, and I am in awe at the fact that at some point in my life I was able to understand all of it. The language is slowly coming back to me, which is exciting. By the end of the series, who knows, I might be close to fluent again. (I don’t think my Swedish was ever super great, but it sure was better than what it is now!) Had you heard about this show? What do you think of it?
Before I go, I tried the simplest salad this week. It’s crazy fast to make and holds up in the fridge for about one day — perfect for my work-from-home life.
1 cup red quinoa cooked and salted (you could also use barley, wild rice, or couscous)
1 small Roma tomato cut into small dice
1/2 cup English cucumber cut into small dice
1/2 smallest red onion you can find, finely chopped
1/4 cup finely chopped parsley
1 or 2 tablespoons olive oil
juice of 1/2 lemon
salt and pepper to taste
optional: Crumbled feta cheese or Kalamata olives for extra saltiness
one thinly sliced scallion
Method: Cook the quinoa and let it cool. Chop all the other ingredients and mix them together. Keeps covered in the fridge for up to one day.
